Pooja also spoke about how her father chose to communicate the change in the family directly to her. She shared, “In fact, I knew about Soni before my mother did. He woke me up and said, ‘I have to let you know that I have met this lady and I am going to be moving out. It doesn’t mean that I love you any less, and I will always be there.’ I said agar woh mujhe nahi kahega to kisko kahega? (If he won’t say it to me, then who will he say it to?) I would rather have heard it from my father’s mouth or my mother’s mouth than hear it from Stardust magazine, Cine Blitz or the mohalla.” She further acknowledged that while she witnessed her mother’s pain, her parents still “always maintained decorum and grace with each other.”

So, are relationship breakdowns usually the result of one person or one event?

Counselling psychologist Athul Raj tells indianexpress.com, “Most relationships do not fall apart overnight. A new relationship or an affair may become the visible breaking point, but emotionally, the distance usually begins much earlier. Years of feeling unseen, unheard, emotionally lonely, constantly criticised, or quietly disconnected can slowly build underneath the surface. People naturally look for one person to blame because it makes the pain easier to organise emotionally.”

But relationships are rarely that simple. “One person may make a deeply hurtful decision, and accountability matters, but often that decision emerges within a relationship that was already struggling in ways nobody openly acknowledged. In therapy, I often see couples who stopped feeling emotionally close long before the relationship officially ended,’ shares Raj.

Transparency and age-appropriate communication when children are processing separation

Children notice far more than adults think they do. They may not fully understand what is happening, but they can feel tension, silence, distance, and emotional shifts inside the home.

“What affects children deeply is not only separation, but the confusion of sensing something is wrong while nobody speaks about it honestly. In many families, children are expected to quietly adjust without anyone naming what is emotionally changing around them. That can leave them anxious and emotionally isolated. Children do not need every detail, but they do need honesty that feels steady and appropriate for their age. When communication is clear and grounded, children are less likely to blame themselves or carry silent fears alone,” states Raj.