R Madhavan rates himself ‘6/10’ as a parent, talks about son’s fame | Lifestyle News


Actor-director R Madhavan recently opened up about concerns as he reflected on the growing fame of his son, Vedaant Madhavan, who has represented India internationally in freestyle swimming and won several medals across global competitions.

Madhavan spoke candidly about the parenting decisions he and his wife, Sarita Birje, made to support Vedaant’s athletic journey, including relocating to Dubai during the COVID-19 lockdown when swimming pools across India were shut. Explaining the urgency of the move, he said, “It was an essential decision taken at the right moment. Vedaant was going through his growth spurt as a teenager, and not having a pool to swim would have meant the end of his international swimming career.”

At the same time, Madhavan admitted that parenting a child who achieves recognition so early comes with its own fears and uncertainties. Rating himself “6/10” as a parent, he acknowledged that his wife has been the more hands-on parent while he focuses on “the philosophical and guidance part… telling Vedaant what has to be done.”

More importantly, the actor revealed that what worries him most is not whether his son will achieve greater success, but whether he will emotionally understand the temporary nature of public attention. “I’m not worried about whether he’ll make it bigger or not. I’m more worried about whether he has the smartness to understand that this recognition will soon fade, and one has to take that as a passing phase, and earn all the other accolades that he has in mind, thus making his own name,” he told The Hindu in 2025.

While success at a young age can be motivating, it may also create fear of failure, dependence on external validation or pressure to constantly outperform oneself.

So how can parents help them stay emotionally grounded?

Dr Sakshi Mandhyan, psychologist and founder at Mandhyan Care, tells indianexpress.com, “I believe that early success can become emotionally confusing for children if praise starts to replace identity. Parents play an important role in keeping the child connected to everyday reality beyond recognition. I encourage families to appreciate effort, discipline, emotional balance, kindness, and recovery from setbacks, not only achievement. Children need experiences where they are treated as normal individuals, not constantly as performers.”

She adds that it also helps when parents create emotional space away from competition and public attention. Regular routines, friendships, downtime, and family interactions keep the nervous system grounded. Children remain healthier emotionally when success becomes part of identity, not the entire identity itself.

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How important is it for teenagers to learn that success and attention are temporary?

“I think it is emotionally important for teenagers to understand that attention naturally rises and falls,” mentions Dr Mandhyan, adding that when praise comes early and consistently, the child can start feeling emotionally secure only when they are being recognised. The difficulty appears when the applause becomes quieter, which typically happens in every field.

She explains that teenagers emotionally handle success better when they understand that recognition is temporary but capability and character stay with them. “Families do not need to reduce ambition to teach this. They simply need to keep the child connected to ordinary life outside achievement. Conversations should include effort, discipline, emotional balance, relationships, and learning, not only winning.”

Early signs that a child may be struggling internally

Dr Mandhyan says, “Early signs can include irritability, perfectionism, emotional withdrawal, disturbed sleep, sudden loss of enjoyment, or becoming unusually self-critical after small mistakes. Some children also become excessively serious and lose their spontaneity. Others appear constantly motivated but never emotionally satisfied.”

“I tell parents to observe the child beyond performance. A child who is succeeding externally may still be feeling lonely, anxious, emotionally overwhelmed, or afraid that love and acceptance depend entirely on continued success,” concludes the expert.





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